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SPIRITUAL AWAKENING: GROWING OUT OF THE DARKNESS

© Dick Rauscher

INTRODUCTION

There are many philosophers, writers, theologians, sociologists, and spiritual teachers who believe that through the growing global information network called the internet, we are witnessing a global awakening of human consciousness. As these neural connections grow in number and in their ability to transfer information between individuals of different cultures, religions, and ethnic backgrounds, this neural network looks more and more like a global mind. Teilhard deChardin calls this the emerging noosphere. 1 This global awakening in human consciousness is evident in the growing number of people around the world who are demonstrating for human rights, the cessation of war and military force to solve world problems, the need to control population growth and eliminate world hunger, the dangers of global warming, the growing extinction of plant and animal species, the uncontrolled use of limited fossil fuels and other natural resources, the looming global shortages in fresh water, and the growing gaps between the rich and the poor. The human species is indeed beginning to wake up but we are running out of time. We must learn to think differently, and we must learn how to do that very quickly. We no longer have the luxury of hitting the snooze button and getting another fifteen minutes of sleep. The problems we are awakening to are too dangerous to ignore. Each of the issues listed above represent a growing threat to the survival of our world as we know it. It’s not a case of if they will become a crisis, it’s only a matter of when. Their combined impact on the fragile global economy will be significant if not catastrophic. Fortunately, we can learn to think differently.

AWAKENING

There are currently two significant academic disciplines capable of offering the concepts and insights required for this transformation or awakening of human consciousness. The first is the study of human psychology. Researchers in the field of human development and psychotherapy have made great advancements in both our understanding of the reactive primitive ego residing in every person, and in the psychological skills required for humanity to mature emotionally and evolve into a more conscious and compassionate species. The basic principles of good mental health need to be taught in our schools so that the next generation of children grow up knowing more of the skills required to build a cooperative, compassionate global community.

The second field of study is that of spirituality. I am not referring to religion and theology. Religions relate to specific faith beliefs and often reflect a significant example of the primitive ego’s rigid thinking process. Spirituality is the life supporting part of all religions regardless of their particular theological beliefs, and it is the essential ability to love unconditionally inherent in every human being. Spirituality is awareness and our ability to pay attention to the experience of life itself; not knowing religious doctrines about it. 2 It is knowing what we need, not what we want.

Both of these disciplines have the ability to teach us how to pay attention, how to awaken to reality and live fully in the present moment with what is. They teach us how to become self-aware; how to explore the beam in our own eye before we worry about the speck in our neighbors.
We do not awaken and become self-aware until we have learned how to transcend beyond the primitive ego of the inner child. We do not become spiritual until we accomplish the transformation of the primitive ego of the inner child into that of a mature, awakened adult. The primitive ego is not capable of an authentic spirituality.

AWAKENING THE PRIMITIVE EGO

The primitive ego of the inner child, is essentially a non-spiritual being capable of manifesting a “conditional” pseudo-spirituality, but only when others agree with its beliefs. The primitive ego is a unique, independent, solitary self that identifies itself essentially as simply a physical body limited to its five senses.

The primitive ego has virtually no self awareness, no sense of purpose beyond “self”, and lives by the motto of “do unto others before they do it unto you”. Archie Bunker is the archetype of the primitive ego.3

We develop an authentic spiritually only when we have achieved a level of self-awareness that allows us to awaken from the rigid, black and white darkness of our infantile narcissism and move into the diversity and “not- knowing” maturity of the middlepath4; consciously embracing the unity, the oneness, and the mystery of the invisible dimensions of reality. Jesus, Muhammad, Buddha, and Gandhi are all archetypes of the awakened ego.

In psychological terms, the unconscious template or hard wiring for the operating system of the inner child’s primitive ego is the schizoid-paranoid position of early infancy; a stage that is never permanently transcended (Melanie Klein 1892-1960). 5
In this first stage of human development the infant learns to split the world into good and bad, employs the psychological survival mechanism of projection, and relates to self and others as part objects.

According to Klein, the infant ego is driven by primitive phantasies and fears of vulnerability which result in a primitive survival of the fittest mentality; a need for power and control. To achieve a feeling of safety and control, the infant splits the world into pleasure and pain, retains the safe/good/pleasure, and projects the dangerous/bad/pain into the world/mother. The template for all further cognitive and emotional development is now in place.

For the next 7 to 8 years, the primitive ego of the developing child continues to mature, but it lives in a place of relative darkness consumed by deep anxieties that come from the infant’s fear of powerlessness and vulnerability.

The primitive ego is reactive to anything or anyone it perceives to be threatening. It creates unending conflict by continuing to split the world into good and bad, projecting the bad into others, and then, through the process of projective identification, it becomes critical and judgmental of those bad parts of itself that it is projecting into the other. Its spirituality is a pseudo-spirituality based on a “conditional” love.6

Over time, as a child grows and matures, it slowly develops the ability to reduce splitting, experience self and others as whole objects, and significantly moderate the unconscious tendency to project unwanted aspects of the self into others. In other words, the child learns how to own its own feelings and begins to develop an authentic spirituality grounded in a less “conditional” love.

As I have worked to develop the Primitive Ego Theory of Human Development over the last twenty years, it has been my experience that very few individuals seem able to mature in consciousness beyond the primitive ego of the inner child; that most adult humans are simply children living in adult bodies.

Because I believe that the future evolution of the human species will not happen biologically, but rather through the conscious evolution of our reflexive consciousness.7, I am very optimistic about the human species’ ability to awaken and mature emotionally, cognitively and spiritually.
There are many modern theorists such as Erik Erickson, Elliot Teriels, Carol Gilligan, Edward deBono, as well as the actual spiritual experience of countless enlightened spiritual teachers and mystics throughout human history, that indeed support and affirm the ability of the human species to mature and grow in consciousness and self-awareness.

Specifically, I believe that Jean Piaget’s well known Theory of Human Development, and Kohlberg’s Theory of Human Moral Development are two of the more important developmental theories that clearly illustrate and support the premise that human cognitive, moral, and social consciousness is a developmental learning process available to anyone interested in growing in self-awareness and spirituality.

Unfortunately, at this point in the evolution of human consciousness, very few individuals have fully awaken and achieved a sustained level of human development beyond that of the primitive ego of the inner child. A sustained, authentic spirituality based on a deep self-awareness is very rare.
Without growth in self awareness there can be no authentic spiritual growth.

In other words, because the primitive ego has very low self awareness, most humans, regardless of how “religious” they claim to be, are literally unable to manifest a sustained or authentic, spiritual consciousness.

Philosopher Ken Wilber believes that most of the current “spiritual growth movement” does not represent an authentic spirituality; it is simply our culture’s worship of individualism reflected in the area of spirituality. This individualistic spirituality has resulted in a random collection of individual spiritual experiences; each one claiming to possess deep spiritual insights.

In other words, we have lost the spiritual grounding that comes when basic spiritual principles are openly accepted and honored by the larger community.

To create a compassionate global community will require a global spirituality that transcends the local tribal mentality of our current world religions. An authentic global spirituality must represent the local tribal beliefs of all our current world religions, but at the same time it will need to reflect the spiritual consciousness, dreams, and goals of the larger global human community.
To accomplish this goal, an effective global spirituality must be based not on specific local religious beliefs, but on an overarching, universally accepted set of basic principles, skills, and mature thought processes required to build any cooperative community.

AUTHENTIC SPIRITUAL GROWTH

As the shamans and mystical teachers of every religion have taught for thousands of years, authentic spiritual growth is the result of growth in self awareness. When one begins to grow in self-awareness, that person is said to have awakened. Awakening therefore is simply the ability to pay attention to our beliefs, our opinions, our prejudices, our behaviors, our assumption, our tendency to split the world into good and bad, our tendency to project the bad, our need to be in control, and most of all, our never ending need to be right.

If it is possible for us to awaken and grow in self-awareness into a sustained authentic spiritual consciousness:

• Why are most of us still operating out of the primitive ego of our inner child?
• Why do some individuals awaken and others don’t?
• What is different between a person who has awakened and one who hasn’t?
• What are the spiritual “signs” that indicate an individual has truly awakened?

The questions above are obviously too complex to cover adequately in this short newsletter article, but let me offer some thoughts and insights emerging from my years as a psychotherapist working on the Primitive Ego Theory of Human Development.

A conscious awakening from the unconscious primitive ego is a specific, measurable, observable event; a definable moment in the life of any individual. It is the moment we begin to pay attention to what we have known to be true for a long time.

In other words, awakening is typically preceded by a growing awareness that there has to be more to life than money, achievement, power, success, possessions, and control; a realization that all of the possessions that we have worked so hard to achieve are not bringing happiness or meaning to our lives. There is often a growing realization that we feel personally isolated and lonely; that we live our lives surrounded by other people, yet we do not feel connected.

Awakening is almost always marked by a growing realization that we do not, and cannot, control the world around us, that we do not have answers to even some of the simplest questions of life, and that our lives are exhaustingly busy and overwhelmingly complex.

We become aware that much of our life has been spent totally unaware of the “now”; asleep to the present moment, lost in regrets and guilt from the past that we cannot go back and change, and consumed by fear and worry about a future that rarely seems to actually happen. There is often a deep sadness or grief over all the years that we were not present and involved in the day to day events of our life; a sense that we “missed” them; an awareness that we have lost our grounding in life.

As these feeling begin to emerge in our consciousness, we are presented with an important choice. Do we stay awake and continue to pay attention, or do we become overwhelmed by the feelings and go back to sleep.

Unfortunately, most people give up hope at this moment and go back to sleep; helplessly mired in the swamp of depression as their primitive ego struggles once again with the self-esteem destroying illusion of a self-perfection that is somehow attained only by working harder. Unfortunately, some choose to move into addictions and despair; into a hopelessness that slowly drains away their spirit.
For a few however, this becomes a moment of true awakening. Despite significant feelings of anxiety and depression, they report feeling called by a deeper wisdom that compels them to face reality; an awareness that they have come to a point where they can no longer ignore the painful realities of their lives. They are no longer willing to let their lives be run by their primitive ego; essentially the emotional and cognitive mind of a child in second grade.

These awakened persons say that when we are able to accept and fully embrace these painful realities and still continue paying attention to them regardless of the grief and despair we may be feeling, there will be a profound moment of transformation, a “felt shift” in the way one sees the world. They describe it as a sense of awakening; a sense of emerging from a long sleep. They are no longer simply an ego in a physical body limited to only five senses. They are now able to embrace the mystery, the not knowing of life. They become the listening observers of life. They begin to pay attention, and become self-aware at a depth they never knew even existed.

Some individuals report this as a single moment of transformation; as suddenly having a profound sense of awakening. Others report it to be a much slower process; that even though they were not aware of an awakening at any single moment in time, they did become aware over time that they had indeed somehow awakened to a new awareness of reality. This latter experience seems to be the more common experience of personal transformation and awakening.

MANIFESTATIONS OF AN AWAKENED CONSCIOUSNESS
Regardless of how a person experiences the moment of transformation from unconscious primitive ego to an awakened consciousness, what begins to be manifested into the world from that moment, the signs that demonstrate that a person has truly awakened, will be the same for every individual regardless of faith or religious beliefs; including those persons who believe themselves to be non-religious, or non-spiritual.

The awakened person has begun a spiritual journey into self-awareness; a lifetime journey into the authentic spirituality of “not-knowing”. The primitive ego’s conditional love based on rigid beliefs and absolute truth has been left behind.

In other words, rigid beliefs or a claim to possess the absolute truth on any subject is conclusive proof that a person is still working out of his or her primitive ego and has not yet awakened spiritually. As a result, they are still projecting criticism and judgment, and continuing to create conflict in the world.

When rigid beliefs and absolute truth are abandoned, the awakened person will begin to manifest compassion, cooperation, and unconditional love. The life denying criticism, judgment, and conflict created by the conditional love of absolute truth will begin to diminish. These are the gifts of spiritual awakening that spiritual teachers like Jesus and Buddha talked about.

But spiritual teachers and human development people both warn that there is a powerful reality that must be understood. The conditional love and judgmentalness of the primitive ego does not suddenly disappear at the moment of spiritual awakening.

Just because a person has awakened, it does not mean that there will be a sudden flowering of authentic spirituality and unconditional love. It does not mean that the primitive ego has gone away. The primitive ego is the ego of the inner child; it is simply old brain. Until a person gets a lobotomy, the primitive ego of old brain will always be present and eager to run our lives.
As the mystic Anthony DeMello reminds us, “anyone can wake up, it’s learning how to stay awake that is difficult”. 8 The conditional love and judgmentalness of the primitive ego will begin to diminish only when the high level of self-awareness described above has been achieved.
Awakening is only the first step.

The mystics remind us that a person who claims to “know him/herself” is usually a very shallow person. The deep self-awareness that leads one into a sustained, authentic spirituality capable of manifesting unconditional love requires a lifetime of self-discernment, meditation, contemplation, and self-attention.

SUMMARY
To briefly summarize, for a person to grow spiritually they must first awaken and grow in self-awareness, but spiritual awakening is only the first step toward ego maturity and an authentic spirituality. In other words, any growth in self-awareness is authentic spiritual growth, but to transcend the primitive ego and achieve a sustained, authentic spirituality requires a deep level of self-awareness.

The skills required to grow in self-awareness come most clearly from modern teachers of human development, and from insights offered by the spiritual teachers and mystics of every religion since the birth of human consciousness.

Since spiritual growth requires growth in self-awareness, and since the ultimate goal of authentic spiritual growth is to reach enlightenment and live in the present moment fully aware of what is, then the evolutionary goal of human consciousness is simply to achieve a level of self-awareness that will result in an enlightened, unconditionally loving, compassionate global community.

Awakening and growth in self-awareness are clearly the most important tasks facing humanity in the 21st century, and we are running out of time to deal with the growing crisis’ of a human culture that insists on using the thinking process of an unawakened primitive ego.

The primitive ego of an enlightened person does not somehow disappear during the journey to enlightenment, the enlightened person simply no longer has a significant relationship with the ego; the ego no longer matters. The essential self is no longer identified with ego, the self is now pure consciousness simply in co-creative unity or at oneness with the Consciousness of the universe.9
Spirituality is life affirming, the primitive ego is life denying. The only question that matters to one who has awakened to a sustained authentic spirituality is “what difference does my spirituality make to the poorest, most powerless, unimpowered person or creature on the planet?”10 What difference does my awakening make to the evolution of the human species and the generations of life yet to be born on this tiny living planet?

These are the questions that more and more people are asking themselves as they awaken from their sleep.
1 The Phenomenon of Man, Teilhard de Chardin, Harper and Row, 1975

2 We are not the source of our attentiveness. Attentiveness is given; it is not something that we produce. It is a gift we use for everything we do. Without attentiveness, there is no experience, no spiritual activity.
Light fills the emptiness. Light is similar to attentiveness.
Light, like the wind (or love), is invisible in itself; it is only visible by its interaction with things. Deep space is filled with light, but space is completely dark, except where an object intervenes. Light, like space, is nothing at all, yet it illuminates everything.
Parabola, Light, Volume 26, No.2, Summer 2001

3 There are several articles on the Stonyhill web site that discuss in depth the concept of the primitive ego and the Primitive Ego Theory of Human Development. (www.stonyhill.com).

4 There are several articles on the website (www.stonyhill.com) that explore in depth the concept of the middlepath. The middlepath will also be the subject of the July/August 2004 newsletter.

5 Melanie Klein l & ll, by Robert M. Young, Tavistock Centre, London, January 2000, http://human-nature.com/

6 A current example of this human tendency to split the world into good and bad and then project the bad into others, is our labeling the terrorists in Iraq as the “evil ones”. “Evil ones” are not human beings, they are part-objects that can be bombed, killed, and abused without guilt. We, of course, are the “good ones”. Unfortunately, our own ability to be abusive, aggressive and hurtful toward others cannot be explored since it has all been projected into the ‘evil ones”.
Klein believed that very few humans are able to consistently live their lives in the depressive position (to reduce splitting, experience self and others as whole objects, and significantly moderate the unconscious tendency to project unwanted aspects of the self into others); that at best, most people could embrace the depressive position only when the universe basically agreed with them. She was pessimistic that humanity as a species would be capable of achieving and maintaining the depressive position.

7 I have found three books very helpful in visioning the future of the human species. The future evolution of homo sapiens sapiens is only a potential at this point in our evolution, but the ideas in these three books offer us a direction for the next steps in our evolution as a conscious species.
The Phenomenon of Man, Teilhard de Chardin, Harper and Row, 1975;
Conscious Evolution: Awakening the Power of Our Social Potential, Barbara Marx Hubbard, New World Library, 1998; and
The Grand Option: Personal Transformation and a New Creation, Beatrice Bruteau, Notre Dame Press, 2001

8 Awareness, Anthony deMello, DoubleDay, New York, 1992

9 The Inward Arc, Frances Vaughan, Blue Dolphin, Nevada City, Second Edition, January, 1995. In Beatrice Bruteau’s words the essential self is unconditional love.

10 What is Enlightenment, Issue 24, Feb-April 2004, The Guru and the Pandit: In Search of a New Moral Compass, pg. 40

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